{"id":145,"date":"2009-05-19T02:02:00","date_gmt":"2009-05-19T02:02:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.dresan.com\/blog\/?p=145"},"modified":"2009-05-19T02:02:00","modified_gmt":"2009-05-19T02:02:00","slug":"the-laymans-guide-to-the-fanboy-view-of-star-trek","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dresan.com\/blog\/2009\/05\/19\/the-laymans-guide-to-the-fanboy-view-of-star-trek\/","title":{"rendered":"The Layman&#8217;s Guide to the Fanboy View of Star Trek"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.dresan.com\/images\/treknerd-1.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.dresan.com\/images\/treknerd-1.jpg\" border=\"0\" width=\"600\" \/><\/a><br \/>There&#8217;s been some <a href=\"http:\/\/www.theonion.com\/content\/video\/trekkies_bash_new_star_trek_film\">confusion recently<\/a> about the &#8220;fanboy reception&#8221; of the new Star Trek movie &#8211; some people going so far as to say &#8220;fanboys will hate it because they changed everything&#8221;.  Well, speaking as a fanboy who recently was seriously arguing with my high school friends about whether J.J. Abrams shitted or pissed on our childhoods (and no, I&#8217;m not joking, those literal words were used), I beg to differ: my problems with the movie are with the movie as a movie, and particularly with its plot logic, not with its degree of Trekkiness.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ll deal with the problems the movie has as a movie later (e.g., Nero is mad at Spock because &#8230; Spock tried to save Romulus? WTF?!), since the movie is so good on an acting\/directing level I don&#8217;t want to give it too much bad press.  (No, really, if good acting is your bag, run to the theater, baby; similarly if you like humor, excitement, action or adventure you won&#8217;t be disappointed.  If you care about a movie making sense &#8230; eh.)  Right now I want to show that it is indeed a good Trek movie.  To see why, let&#8217;s go through the Fanboy&#8217;s Official Star Trek Movie Checklist and see how J.J. Abrams fares.<\/p>\n<p>Oh, wait.  One thing.  SPOILERS AHEAD.  Ok, moving on&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>First off, the big three that we need in any Star Trek movie:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Kirk makes bold command decisions.<\/span> Taking a shipful of cadets toe-to-toe with a Romulan war machine that&#8217;s already wiped out Klingon and Federation fleets? <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Spock is conflicted about logic and emotion.<\/span>  Face it: this is is Spock&#8217;s movie, and we get this quintessential Trekkiness in two flavors, old Spock and young Spock:\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Old Spock:<\/span> &#8220;Trust me, I&#8217;m emotionally compromised.&#8221; <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Young Spock:<\/span> Oh, where to begin, there are so many &#8211; I&#8217;ll take the Vulcan Science Academy and his neat little speech where his voice says &#8220;The only emotion I wish to express is gratitude&#8221; and his face says &#8220;you stuck up racist prigs.&#8221; <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">McCoy gets Kirk and Spock working together:<\/span> Well, this one doesn&#8217;t happen, but it is a prequel, and he does act as a counselor to both of them.  We can see where this is going, but still &#8230;  <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Miss. But a near miss.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>So we&#8217;re two for three, but if we give them two points for Spock they&#8217;re batting 1000.  Now let&#8217;s look at the fan service angle:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Kirk bangs a hot alien chick. <\/span> And she&#8217;s green. <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Spock does something brilliant.<\/span>  See &#8220;Stupid Transporter Tricks&#8221; below. <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">McCoy says &#8220;I&#8217;m a doctor not a&#8230;&#8221;<\/span> <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Sulu buckles some swash:<\/span> <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">People make fun of Chekov&#8217;s fake Russian accent:<\/span> <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Uhura contacts an alien life form:<\/span> You know who I mean.  <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Scotty saves the day with some engineering fu:<\/span> &#8220;If we eject the core&#8230;&#8221; <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check!<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">They pull a Stupid Transporter Trick:<\/span> We get this not one, not two but THREE times:\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Chekov:<\/span> Beams up someone falling. <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Scotty:<\/span> Beams three people on two ships to one platform.  <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: bold;\">Spock:<\/span> Gets the grand prize for beaming two people onto a ship in warp, using only what looks like the transporter system on Scotty&#8217;s dilapidated mobile home. <span style=\"font-style: italic;\">Check.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Now,<span style=\"font-style: italic;\"> <\/span>what about the other things, the fanboy nonsense?  The phasers and transporters are off, and we see starships with <a href=\"http:\/\/www.startreknewvoyages.com\/forum\/index.php?action=printpage;topic=8071.0\">odd numbers of warp nacelles<\/a>, but those are nits &#8211; the special effects get redone in every movie and every show, and if <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Star_Trek_Enterprise\">Enterprise<\/a> can believably portray <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Vulcan_starships#D.27Kyr\">a Vulcan ship with a donut-shaped warp nacelle<\/a> then J.J. Abrams can have the one-warp-engine Kelvin.<span style=\"font-style: italic;\"><br \/><\/span><br \/>Now, I admit I think some of the changes J.J. Abrams made undermined himself &#8211; for example, I think the change of the phasers both made them harder to see visually as well as disconnecting them from Star Trek&#8217;s heritage.  But those are minor nits.  Get over it &#8211; I did, and I&#8217;m probably a bigger fan than almost all of you.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.dresan.com\/images\/treknerd-1.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.dresan.com\/images\/treknerd-2.jpg\" border=\"0\" width=\"600\" \/><\/a><br \/>On the broad scope, <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Star_Trek_%28film%29\">Star Trek<\/a> was <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Star_Trek\">Star Trek<\/a>.  No two ways about it.<\/p>\n<p>-the Centaur<\/p>\n<p>Pictured: the first pic is my desk at the Search Engine that Starts With a G, including a model of the original <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/USS_Enterprise_%28NCC-1701%29\">Enterprise<\/a> from <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series\">TOS<\/a>.  The second is my bookcase, including a model of an original hand <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Weapons_of_Star_Trek#Phasers\">phaser<\/a> and a model of the <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Prometheus_class_starship_%28Star_Trek%29\">U.S.S. Prometheus<\/a> from <a href=\"http:\/\/\/\">Star Trek: Voyager<\/a>.  The blue box USB hub and the salt shaker with the plunger and ray gun are both from Doctor Who.  For those who are confused by the horse without a head, it&#8217;s a <a href=\"http:\/\/www.narniafans.com\/archives\/tag\/orieus\">centaur from Narnia<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There&#8217;s been some confusion recently about the &#8220;fanboy reception&#8221; of the new Star Trek movie &#8211; some people going so far as to say &#8220;fanboys will hate it because they&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[18],"class_list":["post-145","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-sith-park","ratio-2-1","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dresan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/145","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dresan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dresan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dresan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dresan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=145"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/dresan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/145\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dresan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=145"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dresan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=145"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dresan.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=145"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}